Monta Vista Track

My first dual meet is next thursday, march 6th @ gunn.

I've been starving for this season to kick off.

First Meet: (Tomorrow) Los Gatos All Comers

This is it... Time to take and not ask for what I want.


"This is the story of a champion Rounders in the mob and they pop the guns Stand up stand up! Here he comes Tell me what it takes to be number one Tell me what it takes to be number one"
Kanye West - "Champion"

you don't need wings in order to fly...

Valentine's Day

Oh my god, my favorite time of the year is coming up(... not), Valentine's Day!

Let me tell you something about this special holiday, it's just like Christmas. Valentine's Day is for the spoiled. Those that want everything and get everything they want. Let's Elaborate. The idea of V-day is that you get a special day of the year to celebrate the love between you and your special someone. The chances of having a special someone to spend this day with is the same chance you'll have parents that go out of the way to fool you into thinking that everything you wanted is under a tree with a star on it because of some fat ass in a red suit. You must be thinking I'm some cynical dick face right now, you're pretty much right but I wasn't always this way. Actually, I was the complete opposite. I use to think that fate was real. "Everyone has a special someone that they will eventually end up with no matter what decision they make in life." Everyone has a happy ending. (Too bad that's not the case) I would listen to cupcake music all the time and thought my life could relate with the words. (lol.. ) I pictured myself in a relationship with kisses on the cheek, holding hands in the hallway , and talking late night on the phone.

A lot has changed throughout the years. Ultimately my beliefs now are simply explained in the irony of this last picture.

Simplot Games

Exactly two weeks from now I'm going to be in Pocatello, Idaho for my first track meet of the year. I've been training for this season since August. Although I've given up so much for this track season, I know it's going to be worth it when I step out on that track.

Lupe Fiasco - "Fighters"
When the fighters are all around
All the lovers are underground
No one will save you anymore
So what's happening, what you rapping about?
It's a boy. Is it cars? Is it girls? Is it money?
The world?

The truth is that I was never really that fast when it comes to running. I've had chronic shin splints bothering me since day one on the track. No excuse. Although the odds were against me, I'm working past it all and I dropped 2 seconds off my hundred time in the last couple of months. Now I'm about to run at a national level in just two weeks. I'm nervous but I'm not scared. In an individual sport like track, your teammates can't pick up your slack. Whatever your coach says after you do something wrong doesn't make anything better since its all you. Well when I step out on the track, I'm gonna get it. I don't care if I'm going up against the fastest people my age. I'm still gonna catch 'em. This is what I want, I'm running for myself and not anyone else. Whatever it takes. No regrets.

Verdadera

The next Verdadera topic: Loss
I decide to submit an entry of my own but don't really care if people know its me so decided to put it on my blog.

When I see how the people around me change because of the loss of loved ones, I think to myself why I hadn't gone through the same dramatic experience. Am I that cold-blooded? I always expect myself to break down and cry but it never happens. For instance, my sophomore year , my dad's side grandparents were both hit by a car. I spent 12 hours in the ER with my family as we unfortunately were only met with bad news. I had lost the only 2 grandparents I had left. I watched as my entire family broke out in tears and couldn't even control their breathing. I sat and watched. Nothing. I wanted to punch myself for two reasons. One was so I could join my family in their crying session and two because I deserved it for being a heartless asshole. When I ask my friends if there was something wrong with me, I get the answer: "It's okay, we all know our grandparents are going to die sooner or later. You probably weren't even that close with them." The thing is.. I was close with my grandparents. I spent 6 summers of my childhood at their house. When I add everything up, I come to one conclusion. I believe the reason why I don't have any feelings of great anxiety, depression from my current loss of love ones is because my fate has something incredibly horrible in store for me. Allowing me the comfort for now. When I say incredibly horrible, I am referring to the following scenarios: My life in the future. I have a great job, family, and absolutely everything is going well. Then.. 1. my wife, the love of my life, dies. 2. my children die in a tragic accident. 3. my entire family dies. I know its depressing and you must think I have issues for even having these thoughts but its the truth. Its where my mind takes me. How unlikely these scenarios may be, it still scares me. Things that haven't happened don't usually scare me, but when my thoughts create an idea.. it almost makes it real.

TRACK and what it means to me.

Growing up in Cupertino is hard. You're surrounded by people with abilities and gifts, if you don't have one of your own.. its easy to feel left out. I remember my years in elementary and middle school, I felt like something was wrong with me because I just didn't have a passion for something to show off.

Freshmen year: The year that changed my life. This year took its course and flowed through easily. I had just entered high school and my friends were the best, more than I can ask for. School was fun and there was just so much to do. Then my life took its turn when everything began to fall apart towards the end. Good friends were moving, people were changing. When your life takes a turn for the worse, you become a different person. The way I coped with it was by running. Whenever I felt angry with my parents, sad about my friends, frustrated with schoolwork.. I took it outside and ran that energy out of my system. It came to the point where I did so much running, I figured.. why don't I just get some school credits for something I spend my time doing anyway. This ultimately led me to a brand new world.

(who is that loser with the fro at the bottom right?)

Sophomore Year: I can spend hours and hours talking about how Cross Country had changed my life due to the people and the lifestyle, but thats a whole different story. Cross Country was running with schedule for me. I had a set amount of running I had to do every single day and it was okay.. nothing big.


To my surprise, competing in a race with 10 or even less amount of people can turn your inside upside down, kick it around, beat it to a pulp. Running a long distance race is like two people pointing a loaded gun at each other's faces for 20 minutes and in the end they put their guns down in relief.

I had a lot more to say, but i realized how long this blog is going to be.. so I'll be continuing it later.